I need help with a Christian Social Action essay. Here's what I have so far. How's it sound? What does it need

In my opinion, the biggest social problem in the world today is pollution. Not pollution of land, water or air. Those are economical and environmental problems, and though they are indirectly the cause of social problems and the results of other social problems, they are not specifically social problems in and of themselves. I mean pollution in the minds and the hearts of the teenage generation. It is a social problem that is more widespread than any other. It exists anywhere and everywhere that there is a living creature, though it affects primarily the teenage generation. My generation. We are the most susceptible to this sort of pollution, and what we receive now will likely stay with us the rest of our lives.

I need help with a Christian Social Action essay. Here's what I have so far. How's it sound? What does it need
you forgot to say that your parents told you to say this stuff and that you didn't think of it on your own accord and that you forced to hear this crap your whole life.
Reply:My parents did NOT tell me to say this, I DID think of it on my own, I am NOT forced to hear this, and crap or not, I'd appreciate you not assuming everyone is like you. Report It

Reply:That's a great start. The next part should be something like this:





"It is the moral duty and responsibility for all rational people to take a stand against the insidious mind-killing magical thinking that is a part of belief in the Abrahamic god of desert monotheism (Judaism. Christianity, Islam). These ridiculous religious beliefs seek to supplant rationality and hard-won knowledge with the myths, superstitions, fairy tales and fantastical delusions of a bunch of ignorant peripatetic Bronze Age goat herders. As a result of this campaign against sanity, the USA is presently on a par with developing third-world nations with regard to magical, supernatural beliefs (devils, demons, spirits, talking snakes and donkeys, multiplying loaves and fishes, eating god in the form of a cracker, etc.), instead of being consistent with other modern industrial powers, where we belong. This is a national disgrace."





Good luck with your essay.
Reply:I like it. That's very original to use the analogy of physical pollution to parallel the spiritual pollution that you perceive around you. One suggestion I would make, try to use examples that you know about personally. When I was writing college papers, we were never encouraged to personalize them. Just like the evening news, everything was supposed to be from that ever-elusive [non-existent] neutral perspective. I now believe that makes for very irrelevant, boring writing. Get a piece o f paper and just start writing down your personal experience of the things (pollutants) you were talking about..the emotion of.....greed, lust, pride...etc. Also, JESUS FREAK, don't forget that the hero of the story wins in the end, so leave the reader with hope for the future.





Also you can use hyperbole, but use it rarely---treat it like that red hot fire sauce you can get in Chinese restaurants...yum. Humor is good too; as long as you don't get flippant, you won't undermine the seriousness of your thesis. And finally, virtually everyone says to set your paper aside for a day or two when you are done, just to let the dust settle in your mind. That also gives you time to prayerfully consider if any attitude is out of place. Attitudes are important; they always show in your writing.





Hoping the best for you...
Reply:Good start, but I'd suggest a more theologically-sound approach. To wit:


Our separation from God is not because of "sins", but of "sinfulness." Check Romans. We are not sinners because we sin, we sin because we're sinners. It's this "original sin" that we inherited from Adam that separates us from God. Therefore, a "kinder, gentler" generation will not bring a single member one inch closer to God. Only salvation can do that.
Reply:Sounds good so far.
Reply:I think its good.
Reply:Start a two- week bible camp 4 little kids (4-11) nd have the older kids help out (12-18) for community service hours. W do it where i live nd its a hit.