Normal Social Anxiety?

From what I've been reading on answers, it seems social anxiety is more common than I thought....But is it still common for social anxiety to exist to a certain extent?


For example, I never talk in class, I don't talk in social circles, I find it hard to talk at family gatherings, and I am nervous about getting a job (still in high school). I don't really go out on weekends with friends, and the friends I do have are always busy with other stuff anyway; I can never speak up for myself either, because I will be put down verbally and am afraid it will always erupt in a physical fight. I'm very submissive, and facing public speaking doesn't help. I took a speech class and made (or tried) numerous speeches this school year; the anxiety did not alleviate the smallest bit and I heard facing it is supposed to help. I often miss out on things because of this..... is this normal faced by many people as well, or is this....not normal? I just wanted to ask because I need some perspective.

Normal Social Anxiety?
Bell seven, the good news is "This too will pass". I used to be like you in highschool AND college (minus my last year of college) People bloom differently, it may not take you till your last year of college to blosom. I had 3 friends in college: my sister, my best friend and my roommate. Yep, that was it. I never talked in public, if i did, it was a mutter. I could not, for the life of me speak in public. And yes i went through the speech class where I sounded like i was crying when i presented a speech in class. I felt very self conscious because of my significant acne, it was terrible. Last year of college, my best friend and I became friends with the man on campus (one of the basketball players) and all of a sudden, we became very popular. My self confidence didn't exactly soar through the roof but it was a notch higher. The feeling didn't last of course because it wasn't genuine, it was only self esteem by proximity not from within but i had gotten a taste of what being comfortable in my own skin felt like. Over the years, I started learning more about myself and accepting everything about myself. One of the most significant lessons i learned in my self discovery is that i wasn't much different from everyone else and those people that i looked at in college and wished i had their lives did not live very different lives from me. But blosom I did as i advanced in my self discovery and self acceptance.


So moral of the story is the awkwardness, the shyness, the anxiety and nerves are all going to change. In a few years you will be wondering where they went and how you came to become the confident, self assured person that you are. but remember the key is self discovery and self acceptance.
Reply:Let me know-it sounds just like me. Large crowds freak me out! Going out in public is a real drag. It feels like everyone is watching me or maybe even talking about me. There is NO way that I would eat by myself out in public, talk in front of a crowd, or any of the things that you mentioned.
Reply:Anxiety is a yucky thing. You can miss out on a whole lot of life when anxiety takes over. You seem to already know this, so there's the first step. My mom got through her anxiety with self-help tapes, books, and groups. Everyone's anxiety and quirks are different-but facing your fears is the biggest conqueror of anxiety. Good luck
Reply:swallow hard and say what you want to. It's hard, take it slow, but put yourself out there. Tell yourself that they won't remeber any mistakes you make (you'll be surprised to find out that they really don't). Public speaking is different for some reason; I've never had trouble public speaking if I don't know the people but i have trouble with conversations, jobs,ect, like you said. Counselling can be a big help too.
Reply:i have a social anxiety disorder and you seem to have most of the problems i do.theres a big difference between being shy...and having a disorder.i would talk to a parent,sibling, someone you can trust and talk about seeing a psychiatrist. if it does turn out that you have it,dont worry, this is nothing to be ashamed of....for a long time i was very ashamed of what i had and it only held me down more. good luck...wish you all the best!











oh and if you need someone to talk to....you can always reach me!:)
Reply:You almost described me perfectly. I have many of the problems you have. At least you have the courage to take a speech class. I shy away from it. I chose accounting as my major so I wouldn't have to take a speech class. Although when I transfer to a 4-year I will have to and I don't know what to do.


If anyone knows any 4 year college in NY/NJ/CT that does not require speech class, please tell me!